Zinlightened.com and GetZinlightened.com

Tantric sex refers to 'Sacred Sex' and can be a very powerful way to connect to your lover.  In tantric sex, the terms "'Yoni" and "Lingam" to refer to our nether regions. 

"Yoni," or Vagina, means "Sacred Place" and is said to be the source of Divine Female Sexual Power; "Lingham" or "Vajra" refers to the Penis and this term means "Wand of Light" and is said to represent Divine Male Sexual Energy and Consciousness.

The terms used in tantric sex are a far cry from the Western approach to using some not-so-pleasant terms to describe our nether regions. Partners are revered as a 'Beloved' and are to be valued, respected, nurtured and cared for.

Setting the Scene For Pleasure

Set the scene for your Tantric Night of Pleasure by taking the time to prepare a deliciously sensual environment. Put some thought into creating a warm, relaxing, and seductive space within which to begin your Tantric Yoni and Lingham massage, or His 'N Hers Tantric Massage.

Your space should have:

A great location – make sure your space is warm and inviting

Soothing sounds — put on some relaxing and soothing music for a calm environment

Beautiful sights – as the Japanese saying goes, "The First Bite is With the Eyes." Create a visually stunning atmosphere by decorating your space with colorful flowers or rose petals. You can also get together some cushions and place some meaningful or symbolic objects around the bed to represent a calm, safe and loving space.

Proper dress — dress yourself up and make an effort to look good for your partner. Make sure your personal hygiene is up to par, including brushing your teeth and smelling appealing. Make it sensual by taking a shower or bath together and remember that poor hygeine is one of the biggest turn offs in the bedroom.

Try to set some time aside for your Tantric Pleasure Experience as a way to honor your lover, develop skills, relax and focus the mind and spirit.

Massage your lover's entire body for at least 30 minutes before starting your Intimate Tantric massage. By slowly charging up and circulating your sexual energy, the Yoni and Lingham will be more sensitive to your touch.

Massaging the Yoni

If you're massaging your lover's Yoni, start by resting one hand over the area and the other over her heart. Visualize energy from your heart flowing through your hands into her heart and Yoni.

This is a great way to balance emotions and to create a deeper connection between lovers. Lightly pour some warmed cold pressed, organic vegetable oils (sesame, almond, olive) over your hands and let the oil drip slowly over the Yoni and Clitoris.

Always start from the outside in. Start by teasing and caressing her outer lips, pubic mound, proceeding to the inner lips, and massage the opening of the vagina very gently. After at least 15-20 minutes of playful teasing, gently take the clitoris between your fingers and massage slowly (but not directly) around the sides and base.

Take Your Time…. 

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By Amy Levin-Epstein, Best Life

Healthy blood flow is the key to a strong erection, so it's natural that what prevents diabetes and stroke will also prevent erectile dysfunction. You know the drill: Fill up on fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains ... and lay off the stuff that clogs your arteries. Beyond these basics, the foods below will help keep you going strong.

1. Pomegranate juice

A study in The Journal of Urology found that pomegranate juice slashed the risk of ED in rabbits. See the bartender at the Playboy Mansion for cocktail recipes.

2. Shrimp salad

Shrimp is full of zinc, and leafy green vegetables are full of folate. Together, they can boost sperm levels. Put another one on the barbie, and turn the heat up—way up.

3. Oatmeal

Oats produce a chemical that releases testosterone into the blood supply, increasing sex drive and orgasm strength. Mix in some honey (see number six on this list) for an added boost.

4. Spinach

Spinach is a potent source of magnesium, which helps dilate blood vessels, according to Japanese researchers. That means you can count on smooth blood flow and strong erections.

5. Citrus fruits

Men who consume at least 2,000 milligrams of vitamin C a day improve their sperm counts and motility. Vitamin C also keeps sperm from clumping, so they have a better chance of reaching their destination.

6. Honey

Honey's B vitamins aid the production of testosterone, and its boron content helps the body use estrogen, which is a key factor in proper blood flow and arousal. Sweet.

7. Blueberries

The soluble fiber in blueberries ushers cholesterol through your digestive tract before it chokes your arteries. The berries also contain compounds that improve circulation for a natural Viagra-like effect.

http://www.youtube.com/v/jL8CQFo3QvE

<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/saital/2228378850/" title="ALONE by saital, on Flickr"><img src="" width="500" height="330" alt="ALONE" /></a>

The fear of being alone inflicts on anyone who harbors it feelings of insecurity, anxiety, low self esteem and self worth, the tendency to depend and rely too readily on others and their opinions, feelings of emptiness and a needy disposition that makes them unattractive to others.

In other words it perpetuates the very thing that the person fears — being alone.

Yet many who are afflicted by this have no idea what to do about it other than to try and wrestle it to the ground and pretend to themselves and others that they are not afraid of being alone. Does this feel like a tenable strategy to you? Hardly!

There is another solution and I present it here in a powerful way that I feel will shift you and your experience permanently if you wish to undertake this pioneering journey into yourself.

The Motivation of Fear

Let's start with the simple question:

What does this fear actually motivate you to do?

Well, it supposedly motivates one to find friends so that they will no longer feel alone.

So if they are no longer feeling alone what are they supposedly feeling instead?

Well, they would be feeling secure, comfortable, like they fit in, attractive to others, loved, good about themselves, happy, at peace and so on.

What the Fear of Being Alone Does

So in summary one could then say that:

The fear of being alone causes one to not feel secure, comfortable, like they fit in, loved, good about themselves, happy, at peace and so on. (I call this the Summary Statement)

Now if we look at what the fear of being alone actually does to you you'll notice as stated above that it leads to feelings of insecurity, anxiety, low self esteem and self worth, the tendency to depend and rely to readily on others and their opinions, feelings of emptiness and a needy disposition that makes them unattractive to others.

In other words it perpetuates the very thing that the person fears i.e. being alone.

The Toxicity of the Fear Of Being Alone

This fear is clearly TOXIC, is it not?

If you see this place one hand over your heart and as if you are speaking from there simply affirm this to yourself and then notice how you feel.

Now does what this fear does to you concur with the Summary Statement above?

Hardly, because they are exact opposites!

The Truth About the Fear Of Being Alone

So which is the truth about this fear?

Well, I think that you'll recognize that the Summary Statement is false.

A Simple Affirmation

If you do, place one hand over your heart, and as if you are speaking from there simply affirm this to yourself and then notice how you feel.

So do you want this false statement to be living inside your mind or body? If not, as if you are speaking from your heart command that it be forever purged from your life.

Next, with your hand over your heart command the fear of being alone to be purged from your life.

Finally, in the present tense (i.e. I am feeling …etc.) describe how you would rather feel and be. Once you have your list then once again affirm this as if you are speaking this from you heart.

Notice how you feel now.

If you've followed this, you'll find yourself in an entirely new place in your self and you life.

Congratulations!

[ASKDANANDJENNIFER]

Just when did you stop trying to impress your partner?  It seems inevitable in most relationships:  The longer you've been together, the bigger the panties get.

Early on, you may not wear any.  For some reason, men find this incredibly sexy.  Perhaps it's their genetic laziness – the same gene that causes them to watch an infomercial after the game because they don't know where the remote is and they sure as hell aren't getting up to look for it.  The idea of reaching up your skirt and finding nothing standing between them and your sweet spot drives them insane.

After a short time, you spice it up with a sexy thong.  This turns him on, too.  Again… genetics.  Men are hunters, and he needs to explore your "nethers" finding where that little strip of material disappeared to.  We, as women, need to encourage this!  Thongs, g-strings, crotchless panties… They all do the trick to get your man to hunt and gather.

Then, a little more material comes into the picture and you start wearing teddies, babydolls, and camis.  This works wonders in the world of male genetics because men have always been fascinated with uncovering treasures.  Boys love "diggers"… bulldozers and the like.  Granted, probably not the gentlest of methods, but what do we care?  Rip those clothes off, baby!  They see something they like, know there's something more to love underneath, and suddenly they're on a mission to uncover the secrets of your world.

The step women take after this puzzles me.  At some point, women start buying these enormous cotton granny panties.  I hear excuse after excuse about how they're "comfortable" or how there's no reason to "bother" with thongs and such anymore.  WHAT???  Let's think logically here.  ALL panties are gonna migrate up your ass at some point during the day, agreed?  That comfort stuff you spew is bullshit.  I'd much rather have a half-inch of fabric intentionally there than to be ducking around a corner to wiggle five inches worth of material out of my ass.

As for male genetics and granny panties?  We know men are lazy.  We've established that's why minimal clothing is ideal.  While that excites them, granny panties have the opposite effect.  That much fabric reminds them of a blanket and they want nothing more than to roll over and go to sleep.

So use his genetics to your advantage.  Encourage him to explore and remind him there is one hell of a treasure to be unearthed!!!

[Happy Her]

Want pleasant dreams tonight? Well, scientists have determined that pleasant smells encourage good dreams.They have also found that the opposite is true as well...

German researchers have found that sleepers exposed to an unpleasant smell will have negative dreams. The opposite is also true. When subjects were exposed to the smell of roses, their dreams were predominantly positive. These olfactory observers used rotten eggs in their study, but we are sure that a stinky gym sock, left perched on the pillow of your enemy, would work just as well. While we're fairly certain that the researchers didn't plan to have their findings used in this manner, there are always unintended (and sometimes dastardly) consequences of scientific breakthroughs. Because our sense of smell involves such a sensitive and neurologically complex function, and because it's so powerful in its influence on our behavior, it's not surprising at all that so many scientists have studied the effect of different scents on emotion, memory, appetite, energy, and sexual arousal. The sense of smell is known to be closely linked to the same area of the brain which handles memory and behavior, which is why a familiar scent can trigger a vivid memory or feeling about the first time you got a whiff of it. Scientists have also found that our sense of smell intensifies when we sense a dangerous smell — such as a fire — sparking our brain's fight-or-flight response.

It certainly seems logical that there would be a strong connection between smell and stimulation, but you might be shocked to find out what the most sexually "intoxicating" fragrances actually are.

To test the effect a scent has on arousal, Dr. Alan Hirsch, a nationally recognized smell and taste expert and the founder of the Smell & Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago, chose 30 pleasant odors and hypothesized that these enticing scents would stimulate more than just the nose. He measured penile blood flow while exposing men whose eyes were covered to various scents. The winner, by a nose, was lavender and pumpkin pie, with a 40 percent average increase in blood flow to the penis. The smell of doughnuts and black licorice came in a close second with a 31.5 percent increase in penile blood flow. Cranberry finished dead last, so you may want to leave that off the seduction menu.

Hirsch also studied the effect of odors on women and measured their sexual response. The winners: the combo of Good & Plenty candy and cucumber with a 13 percent increase in vaginal blood flow. Baby powder tied with a lucky 13 percent boost. Pumpkin pie and lavender also seemed to stimulate the ladies, coming in second at 11 percent.

Now, you're probably ready to radically alter your choice of cologne and aftershave, right?  After all, who needs Chanel No. 5 or Boucheron pour Homme, when it's apparently so much more provocative to slather a hunk of pumpkin pie across your neck or daub a melting Twizzler behind your ears? 

It's said that humans are able to distinguish over 10,000 different odor molecules. We do this by simply breathing in. That whiff of air goes up the nostrils and makes its way to the roof of the nasal cavity where it hits a tiny area called the olfactory epithelium. The olfactory epithelium contains millions of olfactory receptor neurons.  On the surface of these neurons are odorant receptors that pass the smell information to the olfactory bulb (just underneath the front of your brain) and then on to the olfactory cortex in the temporal lobe of your brain.

[MSNBC]

By Sally Wadyka for MSN Health & Fitness

If you're like most guys, you probably think you already know everything there is to know about sex. But it's what you don't know—or don't bother to ask—that could hurt you. We're not talking about satisfying your partner (although that's important too!), but about issues that impact both her as well as your own sexual health. Read on to learn valuable lessons about birth control, menstrual cycles, and when you're most likely to get your partner pregnant. Anything else you don't know? Well, don't be afraid to ask!

Why she's just not in the mood

You could blame her lack of interest in sex on a variety of factors—from fatigue to stress to emotional issues. But there's another libido-killer you may not be considering. "Many commonly used anti-depressant drugs can have a negative impact both on libido and on ability to achieve orgasm," says Nanette Santoro, M.D., professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Albert Einstein College of Medicine. If you're in a new relationship—and she hasn't yet revealed to you that she's even taking antidepressants—you might be left frustrated and wondering if you've suddenly lost your touch. For some women, being on the Pill can also diminish their interest in sex—probably because the Pill works by suppressing various hormones, including testosterone (the hormone that usually fires the sex drive).

PMS: It's not all in her head

"That time of the month" may be the topic of countless jokes, but if your partner is suffering from premenstrual symptoms, it's no joke to her. "About 80 percent of women suffer from some type of PMS symptoms—from physical complaints like bloating and breast tenderness to emotional ones like mood swings and irritability," says Santoro. Throughout a woman's monthly cycle, hormone levels fluctuate. And right before her period arrives, there's a huge drop in estrogen, and the brain respond to the lack of estrogen by also dropping serotonin production. Serotonin—known as the "feel-good hormone"—is what gives you a sense of well being. Not surprisingly, when it drops, your girl will get cranky, and may also crave the sort of high-carb comfort foods that boost serotonin levels. So be sensitive to her PMS symptoms, and consider yourself lucky that your hormones don't wreak this kind of havoc on you!

Her sexual history is now yours

"You are now sleeping with [whomever] she has slept with in her past, and you are subjecting yourself to any sexually transmitted diseases she may have gotten from previous partners," says Santoro. And while it's not necessarily important to divulge exact numbers and all the intimate details of your previous sexual partners, it is important to know how she has protected herself in the past and when was the last time she was tested for sexually transmitted diseases.

What she can do if the condom breaks

If you've had unprotected sex—because the condom broke, because you thought she was on the Pill, or because neither of you bothered to bring up the subject of birth control in the heat of the moment—there is an option for helping to prevent an unwanted pregnancy. The so-called "morning-after pill" is available without a prescription under the brand name Plan B (you need to request it at the pharmacy counter, but need not get a prescription from your doctor). "There are many theories as to how it works," says Santoro. "It might prevent a pregnancy from implanting in the uterus or it may interfere with the fertilization of the egg." It needs to be taken within 72 hours of unprotected sex, and involves two doses, so if an accident happens, talk to you partner about her willingness to take it and urge her to do it quickly.

Sex may make her suffer

Blame it on anatomy, but women are more prone to suffer from yeast infections, vaginal infections, and urinary tract infections as a result of having intercourse. "Semen is much more likely to disrupt a woman's normal vaginal pH and aggravate or precipitate an infection," says Santoro. "It's pretty unlikely for a man to get a yeast or other infection from a woman." So when she pops out of bed to pee immediately after sex (which doctors recommend to prevent bladder infections)—or won't have sex with you because she's got a burning infection down below—have pity on her and be glad your anatomy keeps you safer from such insults.

Know what she's doing to prevent pregnancy

"Any man who sleeps with a woman without intending to sign on for life as the father of her baby—and leaves the contraception totally up to her without thinking about it—deserves the paternity suit he is risking!" warns Santoro. Seriously, this is a conversation you simply have to have before you get busy. When in doubt (even if she says she's on the Pill or using a diaphragm), wear a condom. "If you don't know her well enough to know exactly how careful she is about taking the Pill or using other protection, then don't take the risk," says Santoro.

Find out her most fertile days

If your goal isn't to become a father right now—and your partner is not using hormonal birth control (like the Pill or Depo-Provera)—it pays to know a little about her cycle. It's a commonly held belief that all women have a 28-day cycle, and ovulate midway through—around day 14. Even if that is the case with your partner, there is still a several-day window surrounding ovulation during which she can get pregnant. Since sperm can live in the fallopian tubes for up to 72 hours, she can get pregnant if you have unprotected sex at any time during the three days before she actually ovulates, as well as the day after. And more importantly, cycles can vary from woman to woman, and even from month to month. "Just because she says that her period comes every 28 days like clockwork, you should still assume there's room for error in that number," says Santoro. And yes, a woman can even get pregnant during her period. "If her menstrual cycle is short (like 25 days or so) and she bleeds for several days, she could potentially still be bleeding but also be ovulating," Santoro explains.

I don't think I've ever met a man you had hardly any common sense. For you young studs out there looking to hook up with a mature older woman for the experience of a lifetime, here's a few pointers to get your first date with your hot cougar headed in the right direction:

1. Trust me when I say she won't be interested in the number of women you've slept with and  your ability to drink a 24 without falling down
2. She won't want to hear about your sorry love life. Keep the Ex's out of the conversation.
3. Unless your a sumo wrestler, don't pig out on that first date. Try not to wipe the spaghetti sauce off your face with your sleeve. Keep those eating noises to a minimum please.
4. Stay off that damn cell phone. Put it on mute if necessary.
5. Check your attire - no holes, stains etc., and if you're wearing running shoes find some that aren't riddled with holes.
6. For God's sake use deodorant. You guys tend to take the term "macho" a little too far.
7. You're probably a little awkward and baffled why the hell she picked you, but if you respond to her conversation with one syllable answers, you're going to find yourself left high and dry. A mature woman expects her man to be interested in her and be able to hold his own in a conversation
8. Some things are on a "Need To Know" basis. Try to keep some of those traumatizing experiences in your past to a minimum. This is a "Get To Know You Date".
9. So you've had 8 glasses of wine over dinner and you don't like the way the guy at the next table is looking at you. I know you'd like to stand up and show her just how "Macho" you really are,  but mature women don't care to post bail on their first dates
10. So she's not what you expected and probably you're not what she was hoping for either, so please remember to keep your roaming eye focused on your date. I know the chick at the next table is giving you the eye, but a little courtesy and good manners goes a long way.

These ten little dating tips for a younger man older woman relationship could apply to just about any dating senario.

[Findamaturewoman]